Πέμπτη, 23 Ιουλίου 2009

βράδια αξημέρωτα..





Oloi koimountai..eimai monh mou..egw kai to ligosto prwino fws pou mpainei apo tis grilies..

Shmeiwseis gia kapoion pou den eixa pote.. gia kapoion pou “daneisthka“ xwris kan

na rwthsw..typseis..enoxes..le3eis pou pia kyloun sto aima mou..tosa xronia den h3era kann th shmasia tous ki omws aftes oi 3 vdomades apodeix8hkan yper arketes gia na mou tis ma8oun.

H eirwnia einai oti den mporw na mhn pw “efxaristw“..pws na mh niw8w evgnwmosynh otan eniwsa tetoia pragmata?pws na mhn efxaristhsw kapoion pou m’ekane na niwsw tosh asfaleia.. na kanw erwta xwris na “prose3w“.. apo mikrh megalwsa m’afton ton kanona..kai h alh8eia einai oti den eixa skopo na ton parakousw..omws htan AFTOS..EGW KI AFTOS MONO..h epi8ymia..h agaph..nai,megalh le3h..afth th syzhthsh thn eixame kanei kai tote,sthn arxh..otan ton gnwrisa..htan akoma ena asteio..ena paixnidi meta3y dyo an8rwpwn ek twn opoion o enas den eixe dei kan to atomo me to opoio epikoinwnei..poso dynato omws mporei na einai ena synais8hma gia na “apokalyptetai“ prin akoma thn prwth synanthsh?mallon poly..apo afta pou de genniountai ka8e mera..htan h stigmh omws..

Den 3erw ti nohma akrivws yparxei sto na klaiw kai na lypamai gia kati pou pote den yphr3e..den anairw ta synais8hmata..anairw thn prospa8eia..to oti pistepsa s’afto pou htan apo thn arxh katadikasmeno..

Ki omws, h zwh ta’fere etsi wste na eimai se 8esh na kerdisw ana pasa stigmh..to kleidi gia thn elef8eria mou to exw mesa mou..de 8a to kanw omws..kai 3erw oti 8a me kynhgaei panta..8a me stoixiwnei to dikio mou..to oti mporousa na anoi3w to stoma mou,na pw treis le3eis kai na ta alla3w ola..na ton kanw na mh 8elei na thn 3anadei..alla den to ekana..den 3erw an prepei na niw8w perifanh h hli8ia pou den to eipa..kapoios 8a elege pws eixa th dynatothta na zhsw afto pou mou a3izei kai par’ol’afta ekana pisw..kai lew,8a me skotwnei ka8e fora pou 8a to skeftomai..kai emena kai osous to 3eroun..akoma ki afth skotwnei..8a th skotwnei gia oso 8a einai mazi..treis le3eis kai 8a allazan ola..h zwh tou,h zwh mou,,ola..den mporw na to kanw afto omws..einai adiko..kai den eimai etsi..den mporw na pathsw panw sthn adynamia tou allou gia na vgw mprosta..einai la8os..ma panw ap’ola ton agapaw..de 8elw na ton plhgwsw..

H lysh den 3erw akrivws poia einai..eimai sto tsak na ta vronth3w ola..na fygw..na mhn 3anakousw pote gi’afton kai na mhn 3anakousei pote gia mena..an ginetai???ola ginontai..afou ton vrhka..meta apo ekeinh th mera..pou pisteva oti de 8a ton 3anadw pote..afou to “paidi apo to schoolwave“ hr8e sto spiti mou..afou eipame tosa..afou kaname erwta..OLA GINONTAI..kai ws gnwston to na 3ekopseis einai to pio efkolo..

Praktika to pio efkolo giati kata ta alla 3ereis pws h anagkh na vlepeis ton allo,na tou les oti ton agapas,n’akous th fwnh tou kai na aggizeis ta xeria tou einai anypervlhth..ki omws..sta anypervlhta panta epivalletai h pragmatikothta..etsi 8avontai ola osa a3izoun..synais8hmata..anamnhseis..ola..akoma kai h dia8esh na deis ta pragmata me ka8aro myalo kai na pareis mia apofash..xanontai,xanontai sth skonh ths synh8eias..ths routinas..ths frashs “egw m’afth thn kopela exw ma8ei na zw,den mporw na thn afhsw twra,syggnwmh..“ kai ti kerdizeis meta apo afto?se ti eisai plousiwteros?sth syneidhsh?mallon oxi..gia 3anaskepsou to..poso plousiwterh syneidhsh mporei na exei kapoios otan prokeimenou na mh xasei to sigouro gyrnaei thn plath sta synais8hmata kai sth 8elhsh tou idiou tou tou eaftou?poso perifanos eisai otan petas kati tetoio sthn arkh?otan den pairneis to risko na to zhseis?na peis “nai..ta 8ysiazw ola..giati den exw niwsei 3ana etsi sth zwh mou..kai to a3izei..kai afth kai egw..einai adiko na mhn eimaste mazi“..

Vevaia de mou peftei kai logos..to mono pou me kanei na epemvainw einai to gegonos oti egw afhsa pisw ta panta..de skefthka kan na ta sygkrinw..esvhsa kinhta,fwtografies..ola..den krathsa oute thn karta pou mou eixe dwsei sta genne8lia mou..oute kan thn pena ths ki8aras tou..ki as htan ta mona dyo pragmata pou eixa apo afton..kai o logos pou to ekana htan giati mou etyxe afto!afto pou gia mena einai e3isou shmantiko an oxi shmantikotero..kai s’aftes tis periptwseis epivalletai na to kaneis..epivalletai na sevesai ton eafto sou..ta ais8hmata sou..akomh ki an gennh8hkan toso syntoma,a3izoun to stoixeiwdh sevasmo..

Afto pou 8elw einai na 8ymountai..ekeinon..emena..EMAS..mazi..na lene oti to zhsame,,na 8ymountai thn Alikh kai ton A___..dyo paidia pou gnwristhkan apo to pou8ena..pou dexthkan na kanoun pragmata e3w apo ton eafto tous..

Poios?poios 8a 8ymatai an twra pou ftasame mexri edw den to synexisoume..kaneis.. 8a meinoume apla « alloi dyo pou den tolmhsan »..den einai adiko gia mas ?afto hmoun gia sena ?ki afto hsoun gia mena ?mia plaka ?mia asteia istorioula ?toso poly ypova8mizoume afta pou niwsame ?giati na mh dwsoume th dynatothta se osous 8a « er8oun » meta apo mas na ma8oun gia olo afto ?opws emeis vlepoume tis tainies,,kai leme « afto den mporei na einai pragmatikothta..den mporei na synevh pote.. »..afto 8a lene kai gia mas..oti zhsame afta pou symvainoun stis tainies…

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